Another Man’s Embrace
By: Keisha Lapsley
Copyright © 2012 All Rights Reserved
“Stacy, I need more,” Dana said.
“You need more what?” Stacy replied.
“I need more of a man,” Dana said.
“But you are already married…what do you mean you need more of a man?” Stacy asked in disbelief. Her sister had been in and out of relationships for the past eight years. She finally finds a man that treats her better than almost Jesus Christ himself and she’s talking about she needs more. That has struck her last nerve.
“I know Jayson is a good man but I’m not satisfied. It sounds crazy I know but,” Dana said.
“Crazy? How about ludicrous? You sound foolish Dana and I am sick of it. Shut up and settle down. How about that?” she said.
“Stacy, why are you talking to me like that?” Dana asked.
“Because I am sick and tired of you jumping in out of bad relationships and complaining about how you want a good man then when one comes along you say that you aren’t satisfied. It’s just ridiculous!” Stacy yelled.
“Well I’m sorry. I won’t talk to you about my life again,” Dana said.
“I see what momma be talking about,” Stacy said.
“What does that mean?” she asked.
“Nothing…I’ve said too much as it is. Dana, just go home,” Stacy said.
“Fine,” she said slamming the door as she left.
Dana had a lot on her mind. Her sister gave her something to think about but she was also distressed that her own mother was talking about her behind her back. Dana knew she was screwed up but figured that if anybody should understand what she is going through, it should have been her mother. She couldn’t identify with how her sister felt either. They were three generations of dysfunctional women.
Dana went back to her house where her husband was waiting for her. He had the table set for dinner beautifully. He put a fall orange color tablecloth on the table with red cloth napkins with thick wooden oblique holders. Then he set candles in the midst of the different fall color leaves he put as the table setting. It was absolutely gorgeous. Jayson had slow music playing in the background very subtle and when she walked through the door, he said with a smile, “Come here sexy.”
“I’m not in the mood Jayson,” Dana said.
“What’s wrong my shining star?” he said.
“There’s nothing shinny about me…never has been,” she said.
“Dana, I don’t know what happened today but I will tell you this…you are my sunshine and anyone who says anything else has to deal with me first.”
“Jayson, what if I told you that it wasn’t anyone else but that I need more of a man.”
That took him for a loop. He treated his wife with all the love he knew how to give. Jayson’s heart was in his throat. For years he’d tried proving his love to his wife and gave her the love she complained she never received from a man. This time it’s too much. He strolled off silently, turned off the music, blew out the candles and walked out the house.
Dana dropped to her knees and cried out, “What is the matter with me?” She wept for a half an hour and the crying caused her to drift off to sleep.
As she slept, Dana dreamed a dream. A man walks up to her adorned in the finest linen like something out of the prince’s closet of Arabia. He was scented with the intoxicating oils of strong cologne that very sweetly flowed whenever he moved. He handed her a rose then spoke to her.
He said to her, “Dana, I’ve watched you from afar for years; and to see you like this brings my heart to tears. Why is your soul in such anguish? Have you not learned my love language? I know you’ve seen me watching you; I’d reveal myself later but I see it has to be soon. Don’t you remember the kiss on your cheek, soft…almost oblique? What about the flower that bloomed just for you? Or the moment when I catered only to you? I love you with all my heart. I’ve been hear since the beginning even when your life fell apart. Dana, sweetheart, choose me. I want to be by your side, on bended knee. Let me sweep you off your feet. Let me carry you from here until eternity.”
“You say I know who you are; you sound near and yet so far. I don’t know your name. I don’t know your game. I’m bogged down with chains. You don’t know my shame. You say you were there from the beginning…but why didn’t you show up then, making a change in my ending? My knight and shining armor wouldn’t have left me alone. He would have rode in on a white horse and made himself known.”
“But don’t you want to know my love? Don’t you want to know on your part what I have done?”
“If you didn’t come then, why should you come now? Tell me, tell me the when’s, what’s, where’s and how’s.”
“I will answer every question you have but you have to say yes to my love valve.”
“How can I say yes when I don’t know who you are? Or say yes to someone who kept himself in the dark?”
“What you fail to realize is that I’ve always been there. But you are the one who closed your eyes because of what you beared. In your heart you are aware and you know for you I care. You say you don’t know but I know you do. So you can quite playing me like some backyard fool. I was there when you cried. Not only that but I wiped your eyes. How soon you forget what I worked out in your favor? And the small victories you savored. It’s up to you what you want to do. You can either keep up the wall or let me get close to you.”
Dana thought for a second in the dream then said, “I don’t know why I deny myself of you; when you’ve shown me I can be free. I want to get close but I’m scared. I want to love, I want to care. Please, take me from me. Take the scales off my eyes so I can clearly see. Capture my heart to chase after you. Cause me to sing jazz instead of the blues.”
“This is all I wanted from the beginning; to see you shining and gleaming. I promise to woo you every single day. Some may be bright and others may be gray. Nevertheless, with me by your side, I will caress you with comfort and be your guide. I promise to show you that I love you until eternity…even at those times that you hurt Me. I will stick with you even then. I will love you even harder through thick and thin. These words I speak is law. In Me you will find no flaw. I won’t let you down though it may seem that way. Know this, you are not a flunky or my slave. You are my friend…best friend…and I’m going to walk with you until the end.”
Dana woke up and the girl that was once lost is now found. She woke up and got off the couch refreshed and anew. She texted her husband to come home then turned on the music back on and relit the candles. Once Jayson returned home, he stared at his wife in disappointment and started to speak but Dana cut him off.
“Jayson, I know I hurt you with my words but if you will give me three minutes to make it right, I guarantee I can heal those wounds with new words.”
“Go ahead and try.”
“You know that my life has been filled with men that have hurt me, not only with their actions but also with their words. I was so mutilated by what they had done that when you came along I didn’t recognize restoration. After you left, I feel asleep and in a dream a Man approached me. I can’t expect for you to give me all the love I need and that was wrong on my part. You also thought you could restore me but because of the severity of my damage it’s not a job that you could do; only Jesus can. Jayson, you’ve spent years proving your love to me. I have to admit that I don’t know how to love you as I should but Jesus said that he would spend eternity proving that He loves me and as he shows me I can show and prove my love to you.”
“I’ve prayed for this for a long time. I love you so much but loving you the way you needed to be loved became draining. It was too much for me to bear. I’ve prayed and prayed for God to do something because it was getting to the point that I could no longer stay. But I’m willing to be a part of your life as I want you a part of mine until the day we die. It may be a hard road but we can do it…with God’s help. Come on my sunshine, let’s make this a night to remember,” Jayson said as they started a new life together with their love in Jesus’ hands.
